You're 21 and not married!? At least you have the afterlife.

Late night thoughts.
Haha, but really.

I don't write my thoughts on my blog very often, I usually write pretty dry, boring "this is my life" sort of stuff.  Buuuut I've been thinking a lot and for some reason I really want to write about this topic: Being a 21 year old LDS girl and being single.

Twenty-one. You're finally an actual adult (18 doesn't count. You can't even buy alcohol). Being LDS, 21 years old for a boy means that you're probably just coming home from your mission. Being 21 for someone that isn't LDS/Mormon, means you can now drink (legally), and you're probably looking to graduate soon, get an internship, do something completely random... and probably even start your career. Being a 21 year old LDS female means that you are probably married.... and should maybe even start thinking about having some kids.

Disclaimer: For all of you girls that are 21 (or younger) and are married... I'm not a hater. Most of my really good friends are now married, and in all honesty, I could not be happier for them. Getting sealed to your best friend for forever is an amazing gift/accomplishment. And I'm happy you've found that special someone.

Also, this post is me rambling,  so you can skip to the end where I have compiled a summary if you'd prefer.

Moving on.

This past year has been weird for me.
My family has started making jokes about signing me up for the Mormon Bachelorette....
and
So many people keep asking me, "so... you seem like a put together, normal girl, why don't you have a boyfriend."

Okay. I usually take that one of two ways.

1. You are asking me what is wrong with me... because if I was "normal," I'd be well on my way towards my goal of eternal progression
2. You are being just the sweetest, and think I should have been swept up by now.

Well. First, being single really isn't the worst thing in the world. Trust me. Second, I've never really felt weird about not having a boyfriend. I don't want to sound arrogant, or conceited, but I know I could have forced someone to love me if I really wanted to ;) But after having that question asked to me so many times... I started thinking about it more...

No, nothing is wrong with me. And I don't really feel the need to explain why I don't/haven't had a boyfriend, because ultimately, I love the way Heavenly Father is leading my life. I wouldn't change any of my experiences or choices and I have complete faith in his plan for me. I know I'll meet the right boy when it's supposed to happen. It won't have to feel rushed or forced. I think a lot of kids at BYU (who aren't married) get ready to leave or graduate and just panic. And try to force or rush something.... WHAT AM I GOING TO DO AWAY FROM THIS PLETHORA OF POTENTIAL FECS (future eternal companions).

Really though... the worst thing you can do is rush into a decision that is going to last for... oh, just the rest of eternity.

I mean, what if the person turns out to be a complete psycho.... well that sucks. You are married. Not only married but sealed. That isn't really something to take lightly. You can't just break up. 

Having a relationship is great... I mean, I'm not a pro. I haven't had a boyfriend for a little while... but I've dated quite a bit. And it's cool to find someone you just gets you. I'm not opposed to having a boyfriend or settling down. It just hasn't been right yet. And I'm not about to force it.

Being LDS, and going to BYU, in all honestly, there is a big pressure to get married. It isn't a bad thing, at all. But it's there, and it's really really hard for some people. Interesting to watch how people handle it/talk about it.

It's okay to talk about, complain about... whatever. Because let's be real, most students at BYU think about getting married and hopefully most people are dating... which ultimately leads to getting married.... but I just feel so sad for the people who get so worked up about it.

I've met way too many girls that are honestly just distraught. "WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME!?" "I'm never going to get married" "I'm not pretty enough, or funny enough, or smart enough"

and then there's the, "eveeeeryoone is married but me."

Okay, I'm guilty of having said that but when you think about it. Everyone isn't married. Sure, 50% of BYU's graduating class last year was married, but that means 50% wasn't.

Some of my friends even with boyfriends feel the pressure. They can't break up with them because... then what. Go on a mission? Leave BYU not married? What will I ever do with my life if this doesn't work out right now. I can't be alone... even though I know it isn't right. Even one guy that I talked to would talk about his girlfriend like.. "yeah, she keeps pressuring me to get married, I just don't really know. I'm not that excited about it." (they got married four months later) Freak. If my boyfriend said that about me....... I'd hope he'd break up with me. Be excited? Too much to ask?

The other thing that really gets me is hearing parents talk about it. I was listening to a conversation the other day about a mom talking about her two daughters. The older one was in DC and had started her career, and the younger daughter had recently got married. It went something like: "Yes! We couldn't be happier for [younger daughter], her and her husband are doing great and are absolutely the cutest." "And [older daughter] is doing great. She's so smart. She's got a lot going for her. We are really hoping and praying that she just finds someone.... I don't know what is wrong."

What the heck? It's funny since I'm an accounting major, so I know a couple of really awesome girls that have graduated and are moving to start their careers. Almost all of them are not opposed to settling down, but are a little intimidated to leave Provo not married.

It's kind of sad that when girls graduate and start careers, and aren't married, a lot of LDS people think what a shame... or that they are some big career power seeking woman and that they shouldn't be doing that. Really? They are doing such cool things. They just haven't found the right guy, cut them some slack.

In the end, I don't really know what the point was to this post... I mostly just rambled. But let me sum up what I was trying to say.

1.  It's okay to be single. It's okay if it takes a little bit longer to find that special someone. Have a little bit of faith in Heavenly Father's plan for you. My favorite scripture, (which has been my favorite since my sophomore year of high school) Proverbs 3:5-6, just gets me every time. To sum it up: Trust in the Lord, and he's got your back. He will direct your path. He has a plan for everyone.

2. Do not try to force something. This is a pretty big decision. Be smart about it.

3. Never ever settle. Find someone that makes you better. That challenges you. That makes you excited about life. But at the same time, don't be too picky either... The grass isn't always greener on the other side.

most of all....

4. Please girls (and guys I guess), don't ever feel like you aren't good enough. Nothing is wrong with you. Just because someone else is on another path doesn't mean that your path isn't right for you. Everyone's plan is different. Your time will come. If you want a relationship, or to get married. Go out. Meet people. Try to find it. If you're doing your part, Heavenly Father will do his. (easier said than done right :))

Good luck to every one out there looking for that special someone. Love is a battlefield. Go on and fight your little hearts out.

B

PS. School starts in two weeks? What? Crazy how time flies. Crazy that I'm a senior in college. I can't wait to see what this year has in store.

My life as an EY intern

Sorry I'm a horrible blogger. I never write, and when I do, I do it wrong. I don't post for months and then I cram everything onto one post. But, don't read it if you don't want to!

This post is dedicated to my whole summer in Oregon, my main focus was going to be my internship, but I'm pretty sure I'll end up including everything. Get ready, get set, go.

So if you know me at all, you probably know that I'm majoring in accounting and I love it. But here's something that not a lot of people know.

One. I've wanted to major in accounting for as long as I can remember. At least since middle school. I have always been really organzied and I have always loved math, so people always told me that I should go into accounting.

Two. I remember when I was in high school, I got to travel around Europe. While we were in London, my dad wanted to go to all of these cool sites. Guess where I wanted to visit. The world head quarters of Ernst & Young. Hahah. Kind of weird, it's all good though. Go ahead and judge.

SO this summer I have had an internship with Ernst & Young, one of the big four accounting firms. I can't believe I'm actually working for Ernst & Young. For a lot of you, it might not seem like a big deal. But it's been my goal since I was in high school, so for it to actually be happening makes me feel so grown up and old.

For those of you interested in working for Ernst & Young: be excited about it. They are a great firm, and they love to see someone who is excited to work for them and can have a positive attitude. My interview was actually awesome. I interviewed with a manager, senior manager, and a partner. They were all super nice and it was more of a conversation then an intensive drilling process. They made me really excited to work for them.

It's kind of weird blogging about work, because I know anyone can read it. But it's such a fun part of my life right now. And also, like I always say, my blog is more for me to remember than anyone else. That's why I always put so many pictures. So I never forget what an awesome life I live.

ANYWAY. Ernst & Young is the best. 

So.... I made this video. It pretty much sums up everything. I feel like I got so lucky with the other interns. They were awesome... and they put up with my constant picture/video obsession. I really wanted to do a remake to "Call me maybe" since everyone was doing their own versions.... Luckily they humored me and played along :) I miss them already.

Ps. This is the first video I've ever really made! I'm pretty proud of it... even though it has a really bad music edit in the middle where it goes to the end of the song... ha oh well :)

MY first day:  

 So. This is me outside of the office. Stoked out of my mind. After the first day, I knew this summer was going to be awesome. I love the feel of Portland and I loved the other professionals and interns that I met. Great start. We pretty much just went over the schedule, and what we would be doing. We got a tour of the office and we got set up to leave for our training.

SEATTLE. So, after our orientation at the Portland office, they sent us to Seattle for training! Jessica McCord came and picked me up from the airport. Man I love that girl. She starts with Deloitte this summer in New York! Oh, she's the best. Anyway.The Seattle office is beautiful. We got our laptops, badges, backpacks, and my favorite part.... our EY email. That was probably one of my favorite parts of my internship. Sending e-mails with the EY signature at the bottom.

They had us read "Expect to Win," by Carla Harris. I finished it up on my plane ride to our training in LA. SO good.  Favorite quote: "If there is something that any of us really wants to do, we find a way to make it happen." 

-Carla Harris

So true. Not only with our careers, but in everyday life. If you want something, you will do anything to make it happen. If you don't want it, you'll make excuses or just not put in the time, or effort it takes to actually make it happen.

The view from the LA office. 

Okay, so I HAVE to tell the Louie Bottega story. Training in LA was perfect. The people were friendly, the training was fun (and useful), and the food we ate was aweeeesome. On one of our nights in LA, a big group of us went to Louie Bottega, a popular restraunt in LA. I was pretty full already... we had been eating SO much, all week. So that night, all I honestly wanted was water and berries. When we got to the restaurant, I knew I would have to order something else also... I didn't want to be thaaaat weird, so I saw that they had octopus. I knew I wasn't thaaat hungry, but I of course wanted to try it. Why not. And then I wanted my berries. All of the Portland interns were making fun of me... because I was honestly so set on my berries (I don't think I've ever been so set on a food my entire life). So after looking over the menu, I concluded that everything was really fancy, but there weren't any fruit options. When the waiter came over, I asked him if they had fruit, or berries... he pointed to a meal that came with some berries on the side. He told me he could see what he could do. He took everyone else's order and then before he left, I called him back over. And I asked him how big the bowl of berries was going to be, because I wanted a lot. He just laughed at me, and said that he would give me a biiiig bowl of berries.

A different waiter came back over 10 minutes later with this average size bowl of berries... so. it was good, but I was like common, I'll do anything to have like 4 of these bowls. The original waiter comes back over about five minutes later, and sees my bowl. (I hadn't started eating yet, because I was waiting for everyone else). He looks at my berries and says, "Oh no no no, what it this?!" He leaves for a minute... and comes back with probably the biggest fullest bowl of berries I have ever seen.

 I'm pretty sure for that night, he was my soulmate. Because he knew what was in my soul. Hahahah that sounds so weird. But you really have no idea how much that bowl of berries meant to me that night. In my mind, I was jumping up and down for fiftteen minutes. I was the berriest happiest girl in the whole world.

And now you all probably think I am the weirdest person in the world, that's fine.

A couple of us went to breakfast Ihop on our last day in LA.

We went bowling at Lucky Strike on our last night and then it was BACK TO PORTLAND.

The week of training was awesome. I love hearing professionals talk and learning about their careers, and how they have made it to the level they are at. It's cool to think that the senior managers, partners etc, didn't always know exactly what they were doing, they started just like us. I think the coolest thing that I realized is how much control we have over our own lives. At this age, I have the power to do whatever I want with my life. I can dedicate my life to school, go to an ivy league for a graduate program, I can drop out of school, I can be a hobo on the side of the road, I can change my career, I can move back home, I can backpack around Europe.... my future is 100% what I make of it. It's kind of an intimidating thought, but at the same time, it is absolutely awesome.

Hahaha, I dont know why, but I got so excited when I saw my name on my cube. Awesome.

My mom brought Brandy and Ben downtown to have lunch with me :)

I am always cold. I would always steal heaters from the other women in the office.... Yeah, it was summer. And I had a heater blasting. Don't hate.

This is me. Being a good intern, and going on a coffee run. Starbucks in Portland/Seattle is to churches in Utah. Every Corner. (This was actually the only coffee run I made. They kept me busy :))

 

Me being weird... I made a bunch of EY symbols and did random stuff. It was the last day. Sweet....

This is Hope. We worked together for the first two weeks. I learned a lot from her, shes is fabulous, and I love her.

  
We got WEST PHOTO OF THE WEEK!? Soooooo legit. Wow. So proud.

And of course all of the EY events:

Intern Connect Day! So. Every year, the firm does a day where every office gets together and volunteers at a local organization. So, for interns, they have us take a day and volunteer. This year, I was in charge of planning it for the Portland office. It was great! We went to Schoolhouse Supplies, we had a tour, and we helped prepare backpacks to get filled with school supplies for children who can't afford them. I think just this one day shows how great Ernst & Young is. Not many companies will pay you for a full day to go out and volunteer.

Timbers game!

Well yeah. Basically my summer with EY was awesome. Ernst & Young is such a great company. I had my final interview yesterday and it looks like I'll be back next summer! (I did the Horizon internship - which is a two year internship). So next summer I'll get to go to Seattle, Orlando, and Chicago! It's crazy to think. That will mean, just through Ernst & Young, I have been to Seattle, Portland, LA, New York, Chicago, and Florida. How cool. I can't even wait.

To start out my adventures outside of work, we will kick it off with a video of my family that basically sums us all up. Hahaha.

Here we are, the whole Nike Crew. We went on family walks almost every Sunday. I'm going to miss that. 

When I lived in California, I was always on a massive hunt for bows. Everytime I went shopping, I just wanted to buy bows. No stores had them. So I finally decided to get crafty. Hails and I were able to whip up some keepers. Awesome.

To be honest, I don't really like going to movies, (I can't sit still for that long unless its one like Tangled) but my family does. So we went to see some cool ones this summer. The best was Brave in 3D. My favorite part was  at the end when the little girl said, "Our fate lies within us, you only have to be brave enough to see it." Which goes back to what I was talking about earlier. Believe in yourself and you can do anything.

I was so happy I got to see all these girls. It's funny how with our group of friends, we literally all went to different schools. But when we come home, it's like nothing has changed.

My little Lulu. Okay. Funniest picture I have of Lulu all summer. It just kills me. I took Lulu running for me once this summer. (which I normally don't do because she likes to smell other dog's pee way too much). And when we got back, she literally was heavy breathing for 20 minutes. I felt so bad. Hahaha. Poor doggie.

Anyone who knows me, knows that I love matching. My girl friends in the accounting core made fun of me because I love wedges and I love dressing up. But this was the fourth of July, and I made my sister dress up in red white and blue like me. Our whole family actually was in red white and blue............. hahahahhahah

Lots of backyard games this summer. 500, one of the favorites. 

And sometimes, we all just want some Sharis pie. Cocount chocolate Creme... to die for.

Fourth of July and my friends wanted to go to a rodeo. Hahah I learned that rodeos with your 21 year old friends are different than rodeos in Utah. I don't think we watched a bull or a horse for more than 5 minutes till we went back to the beer garden. Hahaha. So that's why I love this picture so much. It's me with my snow cone. Awesome.

Emily came and picked me up and we watched fireworks with my family. I absolutely love this girl. 

Hahahahah and then James was in town from BYU so we went to 711 with trev and did some legit sparklers. Thats him being Harry Potter.

Here's some pictures of our family trip to Sunriver:

Full of hiking, tubing, karate chopping. Hahaha. We all went horseback riding last time we were here except no one wanted to do that this time. I think it's because when you picture horseback riding, you picture the horse running wild though forrests with you on it's back. Not being guided though a trail with a trainer. Hahah. Maybe one day.

I got to see this girl. We were unseperable during high school. BJM2. She's engaged and getting married next summer! I can't even wait! She sent me a recording of her sister singing their wedding song and I almost started crying. So cute.

AND THIS ONE GOT MARRIED! One of my best friends in the whole world. Christine Staley (now Kelly...). I just remember during high school, driving to her house before school and dragging her out of bed forcing her to come to seminary yelling "IM NOT GOING THERE ALONE. YOU WILL GO TO BYU. AND YOU WILL BE MY ROOMMATE." Roommates our freshman year, and roommtes our sophomore year, and then I left to South America, and when I came back, she was a gonner :) But. She'll always be one of my favorite people, and I'm so glad I got to be a part of her wedding. I got to throw her bachelorette party and see her when she came out of the temple....

Yeah, I'll admit it. I cried. Don't judge. It was just so cool to see Christine get married. When her and Steve came out of the temple, it was such a cool feeling. I've known her since middle school, and I couldn't be happier for Steve and Christine.

Yeah, I'm pretty lucky that my sister and I are best friends. It's awesome because whenever we go on vacations, or just hanging out at home... I always have my best friend with me. I'm obsessed with this girl.

And this boy. I have no idea, but after I left for college, I'm pretty sure he grew two feet and totally grew up. I drove with him a few times this summer because he has his permit...... how is he already driving!? He turns 16 in one month. It's crazy.

Another family walk. I'm pretty sure Lulu was always most excited. 

Every single morning. Getting ready. Celin Dion. I'm obsessed with her. 

So someone at work told me about the cutest restaurant in Portland called "Mothers" SO I had to take my mom. We went one day before work for breakfast. It was so good!

So I didn't watch American Idol.... but I went to the concert. Suite food. Pretty awesome. Who knew that some guy named "Phillip Phillips" won. Who names their kid the same name as their last name.............

Brandy and I spent a Saturday together downtown portland at the Saturday market! It's awesome. Music, food, and lots of cool booths. Portland is sooooo weird. Hopefully everyone that visits Portland can come on a Saturday during the summer so they can experience it.

YSA Boat dance. It was actually super fun. Boat ride around Portland? Alright. 

I was SO happy I got to be here for my little brothers birthday. I'm obsessed with this little one. I can't believe how old he is getting. And his friends are hilarious.

Our little eleven year old :)

Salt & Straw. It's the latest Portland rage! So Hailey and I had to try it out. The saying in Portland is, "Keep Portland weird," so of course it had a twist to it. There are all sorts of flavors. Blue Cheese with Pears, Sweet Vinegarette, and others. It was actually really good.

"Last Thursday" they have during the last Thursday's during the summer......... Hahahhaahhaha coolest thing ever. Biggest hippie fest of my life. It was awesome.

So I decided to take the GMAT last minute. Which means... I didn't study that much. It's a pretty expensive test to take just for "fun" but.... yolo. Hopefully I did alright :)

We spent a weekend camping. Yeah. I'm not really the camping type...  and camping hates me. My picture won't even turn for me. dumb.

One thing I love. I love watching my dad with little kids. I can't wait to watch him with my little ones. He's going to be such a good little grandpa :)

My dad and I went on a bunch of runs this summer. My favorite, the run around the Nike Campus. it's an awesome run. They are putting in a new trail next to Nike. So we will have to do that trail next summer :) Can't wait.

One thing that really saved my life this summer: Snapchat. Hahaha. Everyday all day. I honestly just love it. I don't know why I save so many of them... I don't know how people don't have iphones. hahha.

I actually love going to YSA events. Especially this year. I always think I don't know that many people.... buuuuut so many of my friends got home from their missions this summer and are home, that I always had a blast.

Oh. My friend Nathan juuuust got off his mission and I randomly saw him at the YSA dance, so he came over and hung out after AND then he was really good friends with my friend Austin who also JUST got home from his mission. So we did a group FaceTime. Hahah I can't believe how all my friends are coming back from their missions this summer! I cant WAIT TO SEE THEM ALL.

Speaking of FaceTime... I honestly think FaceTime is the coolest thing. You can FaceTime someone across the whole world. 

I mean heres Justin in India..... almost 10,000 miles and it's like he is right in front of me. technology these days....

I went on runs downtown Portland along the waterfront. Gorgeous run. And of course a nice cool down in the fountain...

 I went to young womens with Brandy for an outdoor movie. Tangled. I almost died I love that movie so much.

Honestly, this summer in Portland was so great. I can't believe it's basically over. STACY COMES TOMORROW!!!!!! I'm honestly so excited.